What to Consider Before Starting Therapy

Any counselor or therapist worth their salt will tell you that therapy is not an easy process. Often clients come in with the hope of finding clarity, insight or peace. While this is in line with my personal counseling philosophy, achieving those things often involves delving into painful thoughts and negative feelings at times.That being said, therapy is an investment. It's both an investment of your time and energy.  The hope and goal should be to establish a net gain that makes delving into the complexities of your life all worth it. There are, however, a few things you should consider before entering therapy:

The therapist

It is widely known in the counseling community that the single most important contributor to success in your counseling process is the relationship between you and your therapist. That means that you should exercise your discretion in choosing who you think will be a good fit for you. Do your research! Look at your potential therapist's website and social media accounts to get a feel about who they are and their perspective on therapy. Here are some possible things to consider:

What is their philosophy on mental health? What kind of treatment do they offer? Do they have times available that are convenient for you? Do they have the appropriate training, education and licensure?

Cost & Value

I've included both cost and value of therapy as potential things to consider. While some use these terms interchangeably, I think there's a bit of nuance to unpack, especially when considering the personal investment that is therapy. I tend to think of cost as the bare bones dollar amount that you pay for a service. Basically, can you afford this therapist's hourly rate based on your income? If not, do they offer a sliding scale for people with lower incomes? Conversely, value refers to the actual financial cost versus your potential therapist's training and specialty. More simply put, do you feel this potential therapist is worth what they charge?

Location

You won't make it to your regular appointments if it's horribly inconvenient for you to do so. Does your potential new therapist work out of a convenient office location? Again, value comes into play here. If your therapist is a little out of the way, do you think their services are worth the extra trip?

PS If your therapist's office is inconvenient for some reason, you may want to inquire about Skype or online therapy services.Time. Do you have the time to commit to weekly meetings? What about twice monthly? Is your potential therapist flexible enough to meet your scheduling needs? If not, then you should likely ask for a referral to another provider.

Kevin Breel Talks Depression

Today I wanted to share with you what I think is an incredible testimony of a man discussing his battle with depression. In this TED talk, comedian and mental health activist, Kevin Breel describes the isolation and pain of depression  as well as discusses the cultural stigma concerning mental health conditions.  It's extremely powerful and insightful.  Here's just one quote from Breel's talk:

If you think that true strength is never showing any weakness, then I'm here to tell you...you're wrong. You're wrong, because it's the opposite.

What is mental health?

Too often when we have discussions about mental health, many of us tend to focus on deficits, challenges and difficulties. This does make some logical sense as the phrase was coined by the medical community. But, I would argue this model refers to severe emotional difficulties, leaving out a large portion of the population who may not present with actual clinical diagnoses.

My philosophy is that we should all embrace and welcome a definition of mental health similar to the perspective of how we view physical fitness. Like physical wellness, mental health is not only about challenges but it also about how well we can perform and emotionally maneuver throughout life.

Consider this, we don't think of people who have not run marathons as deficient do we? We don't normally consider them to be "unfit", right? However, they are able to perform extremely well in a given set of circumstances with proper training. Well, the same can be said for mental health.

Many of us come from communities where emotional health issues were overlooked, or as is most often, not explicitly addressed on a day-to-day basis. Unfortunately, sometimes that leaves us without the experience or "training" to adequately identify our feelings and then develop strategies to manage them and the world around us.I encourage you to consider this definition of mental health from the World Health Organization:

Mental health is defined as a state of well-being in which every individual realizes his or her own potential, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to her or his community.

I like this definition because it encompasses a level of "fitness" of sorts. It relays the message pretty clearly that mental health is not only about those with the biggest challenges, but it also encompasses all of us who appear to live , love and productively contribute to our society. To me, that's a hopeful message that lets me know that all we need as a society is a little more "training".

How are you preparing to run the race that is your life?

App Spotlight: Breathe2Relax

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Today's post features a free app available in the iTunes Store and its called Breathe2Relax.

Diaphragmatic breathing or "belly breathing" has been shown to help reduce stress, lower blood pressure and increase overall feelings of peace and relaxation. Breathe2Relax is an app that helps you learn the skill of belly breathing so that you can enjoy its benefits practically anywhere.

Most of us haven't learned how to breathe deeply to get the benefits of belly breathing. If you suffer from severe anxiety or have a history of trauma, engaging your mind-body connection by using belly breathing can also be extremely helpful. That being said, while this type of breathing can be very therapeutic, it can also be very triggering for some folks so it may be very helpful to have the support of a therapist to guide you through this practice especially if you fit the above criteria.

I think Breathe2Relax is an especially good app because it not only helps create a relaxing ambient environment, but it also features a video demonstration of the proper way to belly breathe. You can also personalize your inhale and exhale timers so that your in-app coaching is tailored to meet your unique needs and abilities. With a quick and easy setup, I think most people could benefit greatly from this cool piece of technology.The Breathe2Relax app is free and available both in the iTunes and Google Play stores.

3 Tips to Achieve Work-Life Balance

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These days it can be extremely challenging to achieve a healthy balance between work and the rest of your life.  And living a balanced life is essential for a healthy mind.  It can even help foster productivity.  Here are 3 Tips to Achieve Work-Life Balance.

Keep it simple

It's often all too easy to get caught up in the drama and stress of the workplace, especially when you have complicated office dynamics and mountains of work to get through.  The next time you're feeling overwhelmed, take a few moments to re-energize and simplify.Create a to-do list once you arrive to your office ranking the toughest tasks of the day to the easiest.  Tackle the tough stuff first in the day when you have a lot of energy and work your way down.  That way you can leave the office at the end of the day knowing that you worked through your toughest tasks even if you didn't make your way all through the list.  If you're feeling particularly overwhelmed, don't shy away from asking for help. Chances are co-workers will be glad to help you out especially if they know they can rely on you when times get a little tough for them too.

Take a break

Huffington Post recently published an article titled, "Americans Are Too Afraid and Stressed to Take Days Off from Work" in which author Jillian Berman reported that about 40% of Americans don't plan to use all their paid time off this year.  That's a high number!  While some of us may feel that our jobs really need us for our excellent work, as humans with full lives we also need (and deserve) a break.  Taking time off for a vacation is a simple and obvious way to give yourself a little break. If traveling isn't your thing, or not cost-effective for the moment, consider a staycation and visit some local sights in your city or town or catch up on some much-needed leisurely reading.

Unplug

Over the past thirty or so years, technology has become an increasingly bigger part of our daily lives.  That can often leave us feeling stressed out and overworked if we spend time away from the office answering emails and taking calls. Every job can stand a little down time during the day so if you struggle to step away from your gadgets, try starting with a 15 minute tech break and gradually increase your time until you reach a time you're comfortable with. You may even want to take a nice long bath to ensure you can't hear or see that phone of yours.

While everyone's work circumstances differ greatly I hope that these simple tips might help you gain a little more balance in your daily life.